just a bunch of things going though my head.....

The past couple of days have been very difficult. I could almost say they are just as difficult as the tainted days of 1999. I don't remember the last time my cries meant so much. I have messed up so many times. And I have been forgiven. I don't deserve to be forgiven this time. I am thankful tho. It must be difficult to tell apart real tears from fake ones. Knowing me, I cry over everything. My word means nothing. All I can do is show you that I care, I love; but it's hard because I have been incapable for many years. My heart's been hard as rock and cold as ice. But I will try. All I want is to have everything the way it was. Seems impossible to achieve at this moment, seems like just a nice dream, but I'm willing to put effort into it. I'm really sorry. I will try to show that I am not empty and I have so much to offer but.....I'm sorry.