What happened? I don't quite know...

It has been couple days since my last entry. I am kinda tired. Tired of life, school, people, myself. I don't know. I wish I could be this big bear and go into hibernation. It would be nice to wait until everything cooled down. I am under alot of stress yet at the same time I don't give a shit. The only thing I care for is him. Nothing else... I can't live this way. It sucks. But I have to hold on, even if that means I have to hold on by myself. I dont wanna hurt him. I have to let him go. At least for now. So at least he can get some space from me. Because no one else cares enough to give him space. Everyone constantly pressuring him, constantly on his case. Judging and gossiping about every decision he makes. I don't get it. He would have never wanted this to happen. He never wanted us to be separate. But oh well. I guess this is good for him. I am falling apart because I am weak but he is hanging on tighter because he is strong. He is going places. Without me, he has more potential to be happy and successful. I don't know how I held him back. I thought we were good for each other. I guess I was mistaken. I have so much love and care for him. I am just sitting here and waiting for him to realize that I will always be sitting here and waiting and loving him. It's like the whole world is against. us. Why? I don't understnad. But, this is just a test. We are being tested. Our love is being tested. And I have so much hope that we will pass the test.