I don't know why my mind is so full of stuff. I don't know why I have not done anything for school for the past 2 months. I am surprised at how I am not failing any classes. I don't even have any Ds. Although, I deserve them. I need to put myself together and do my homework. I should be happy and I am... But I dunno why I act this way. I am just hurt by life. I dont know what that is supposed to mean. I don't know why.
I should be happy because I have everything I need. Everyone I love is right by me. I need to keep my loved ones close and my enemies far far away. I don't think I have any enemies. I am kind of tired. But I need to do study. I don't know what is wrong. I don't think anything is wrong. Am I just thinking too hard and making my perfect life imperfect? I don't know, the only thing that is perfect in my life is... He is the only one.
I have a virus in my computer and it sucks. I wish I could be with him right now. The only time I can be myself... the only time I can think sraight... the only time I am happy is when I am with him. I bet he doesn't even know/realize how he influences me.....
I don't know why my friends are stupid or act stupid or say stupid things. They just simply don't know/understand.... i don't know. They don't care. Therefore I shouldn't care. i am exhausted. I should go to sleep. But I can't. I am waiting for his phone call. I don't know. I hope he calls. I need to turn in my math homework tomorrow morning. Katelyn said she would take it late. This whole group presentations deal is retarded. No one really knows what the hell they are talking about. Mr. Kelly just sits there and does nothing. How about he taught us the review material instead of retarded students who don't know what they are doing, What the hell??? But whatever... i guess he doesn't care enough.
History quizes suck. We should just do a whole bunch of review stuff in class. Doesn't matter how much you study it is apperent you will fail. I will fail tomorrow, so will everyone else. It sucks.
Tests are about 2 weeks away. What the hell? When did time start moving so fast?? Just a few weeks ago I couldn't make time move. It just stayed there and tortured me every minute. I am worried about German. If I don't get that diploma I am going to burn Germany.
I am exhausted. I am tired. It takes a text message to make me happy. I am asking for too much. I love him too much. Is there thing as too much? No... I have checked my phone 3 hundred time in the past 30 minutes. That cannot be healthy. I hope he got all his stuff done.
Goodnight!
(10:30 PM)
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