There Is No Easy Way To Cry

And as I watch you leave I stand
Inside my house of straw
And everywhere I go I find things recollecting to my mind
How right it all could be could be
So right now

Good lyrics.

I loved him. I love him. I will love him. There is no easy way to cry. I will cry until my eyes stop producing tear. Today, he left. It hurt me to see what I did to him. He is in pain. I did that. I'm ashamed. I want him to stop hurting. I want him to be happy. I wish God gave me all his pain, and he was happy. I did that to him. I'm awful. Why did I do that to him? Why, when everything could have been so right? We could have been together right now, not a care in the world, happy, holding each other, kissing each other, making each other happier then ever. I ruined it. I just lost the most precious person in my life. I see no purpose in anything. Why did I do that? I'm going crazy, all I can think about is him and what I did and how he is hurting. My pain is nothing next to his. He doesn't deserve the pain I cause him, but I deserve my pain. I will pray for him to be happy. I want him back, but he can't come back. I'm no good.

He always told me I was good. After everything I did to him, he still told me I was good. I remember the day he got in a small car accident and he called me. I remember how he came over and I held him in my arms in my bed. That was a hard day for the both of us. But I remember being there for him. I wish I was there all the time. I loved our ten month relationship. I wish I could make it happen again. I keep saying the same things over and over again. I love him. I couldn't say it enough. I wanna show him I love him more than ever. It's all too late. There is no easy way to deal with this. Everything had ended. It's all so so late...